I'll be back SOON. Tad (photo in my last posting) and I have decided to go back to Spain and Majorca for a few weeks before returning home. Well...maybe Tad will be coming home...and maybe he won't...if he's a good boy, we'll see... Don has been so patient with me. Will be home writing a monthly column again before you can say...
...it's a def...diva dona does DREAM...
Dolls, I can't believe Ann Hathaway stepped right in front of me for this photo op!
Such has been the life on the West End for yours truly. Great premiere, yes, but is there any respect here pour moi? I'll be home for Christmas - I know that's a song, but really, I'll be home in the USA for Christmas Day with so much dirt to churn up for my January column 2013 - the first for you dollcakes in months and months!
I'm right behind her right ear lobe, which you can't see either...damn British photographers!!!!!!
My dears, I ran into fellow diva Elaine Paige at a party the other night and she told me about a concert she is doing November 27 here with Ruthie Henshall at Westminster Hall to benefit The Prince's Trust. I can't wait! Love Elaine and her great talent!
Promised you a column of what's going on here...having soooooo much fun. Soon, dolls, soon!
Did that Limey...terribly sorry, BRIT ask if I used to be Diva Dona the internationally celebrated columnist? I just arrived in London today, and I thought it would be so nice to be recognized here...but...used to be...Uhhhhhhh!
Ahora en Espana con paella valenciana...que sabroso! or as the Mexicans would say, que rico!
Miss you all, but am having so much fun! On to Italy next week ...Roma, Venice, Florence...then to the West End of London in October...can't wait to see the latest offerings on stage!
see you all soon!
Friday dear Don is your BDay. Birth Day? They should call it Happy LiveDay, because, my dear, you still LIVE, and that's a miracle in itself. How old are you, dear friend? Really? Ha, ha!
"We'll always be bosom buddies
Friends, sisters and pals,
We'll always be bosom buddies...
...How old are you, Don? The truth!
...I'd say, somewhere between 40...and...
Who else but a bosom buddy will sit down and tell you the truth..."
I know you've missed me. Wish I could be back for your party Saturday with lots of dish - tell my dollcakes I've missed them too...Can't wait for my column to start up again, when I get back... in a while!
Here's a little present to cherish ...
Ooh la la, those French boys, as sweet as the pastries!!!
Je vous verrai ...bientot!
Don Grigware has granted me an extra month or two, so I will continue on to Spain, Italy and maybe London..will give you the latest theatre news from the West End when I get there.
Dona and I took a little spin around the French Riviera and now we're on our way to Paris for two weeks. Dona says: Bonjour! Je vous verrai (I will see you all) ... en aout (in August) mes chers! (my dolls!) Soyez bons! (Don't do anything bad!)
Ooh, la, la! Is Paris the right choice for good girls like me?
Don Grigware has granted me a month's vacation. Bless him! Let's see, what will I do? Well, maybe a short trip to Europe...will miss you. Be back in time for Don's BDay on August 17!
Look at these lead actress Tony winners. What do you think?
Nina Arianda for Venus in Fur Audra McDonald for Gershwin's Porgy and Bess
Well, dollcakes, I've never been nominated for any role I've played en mi vida...but I can guess that once you are, you have to keep face and pretend you're happy for your fellow nominees when you know deep down you want to win so badly you'd KILL for it!!! How do you think these two winners measure up? Should some other nominee have won instead? Well...based on watching Tracie Bennett as Judy Garland, I couldn't see or hear a resemblance to the great legend, so I'm sure glad she didn't win! Will have to judge the overall performance for myself next year when it transfers to the Ahmanson for a spring run. Nina Arianda (pictured) seemed so pretty, fresh and vulnerable, I would just love to see her performance - I'm sure she's delectable! And...I adore Miss Audra McDonald. Her voice is one of the very best on Broadway, but she's already won 4 Tonys, so I would have preferred to see Jan Maxwell pick one up for her scintillating performance in Follies. Was also disappointed that Follies did not win Best Revival of a Musical. I've heard bad things about this Porgy and Bess, so I can only imagine that since Follies won Best Musical originally in the 70s, voters decided to pass to something else. Quel dommage!
As far as the overall Tony broadcast is concerned, let's bring back Hugh Jackman as host. He's ever so much more exciting than Neil P Harris! Happy to see Diva Lupone in the opening and so sparkling with Mandy as they sang some cute ditties while announcing Best Revival of a Musical. Til next year, dolls, remember an award is just an award, it's the performance that will be remembered, not the award! Losers, get your heads out of the oven and smell the roses! lol dona
'til July when I'll bring along some fireworks to throw atcha! xxx
I'm shocked and appalled - not at Travolta's behavior - at an online newspaper like the Huffington Post reprinting something meant for the National Enquirer. When is all this CRAP going to stop? Is there no PRIVACY any more?
"[Travolta had] a strange demeanor, bloodshot eyes and climbed onto the already setup massage table...Travolta removed the entire sheet from his body, and he claimed the sheets were sticky and could not tolerate the heat...Travolta further indicated that he likes a lot of 'Glutes' work meaning a massage on his buttocks...While [the plaintiff] was massaging near Travolta's buttocks area, Travolta would open his legs and spread his butt cheeks open and had a full erection and would maneuver in a way to try to force Doe Plaintiff No. 2 to touch his anus and around his anus."
Travolta suddenly turned on his stomach with his legs wide open with a full erection. He then tried to force Doe Plaintiff No. 2's hand on Travolta's scrotum. Then, Travolta started to grab, rub and caress Doe Plaintiff no. 2's upper thighs and buttocks....Travolta still had an erection and wanted his abdominals done, but Travolta's erection was in the way and he refused to have his penis covered by a sheet or a pillow case cover."
Are you hot and horny yet? Is this what journalism is supposed to do? What has the world come to!!!!!!!
Well, dolls, look what I found (right) at my door step after a bus and truck tour of Camelot - you got it, he played Lance for two years in the Hinterlands; there was nothing to do but do the show and work out at the nearby gym 24/7, looks like. Woa!!!!! He danced in my act a couple of years back, stripped at a lot of local waterholes, as you can see. Stopped by to see if he could get some work, so he's been planting tulips in the backyard and sleeping on the sofa. Just auditioned for Daddy Warbucks in Annie, and it looks like he got the part, so he'll be gone in a week or so. I sure will put him to work for me in the meantime. I'll think of what needs retooling around here, believe me!
tracie bennett as judy garland in end of the rainbow
Let's get serious and onto what's happening on the real show biz front! The Tony Award nominations! So much controversy is surrounding End of the Rainbow and the accuracy of the portrayal of Judy Garland. The last three days of someone's life! How does one know for sure what happened unless they were there? And if something did or did not actually happen, does that action necessarily throw the overall performance out of whack? From what I've heard Tracie Bennett's work is brilliant. She has been nominated for an Olivier Award and three other Olivier Awards in the past. The actress is certainly no slouch. If she looks, sounds and acts like Garland as we were used to seeing and hearing her, then her work is meritorious. I've heard the score, and she may not have the little subtleties of Garland's voice and phrasing, but she's powerful, dynamic and fully committed, and sends the songs soaring. So, if her acting is as good - and I've heard that it is - then she deserves that nomination! Let's critique the script but not the actress! Thaaaaaank you! Linda Lavin seems to be her chief competition, as her reviews have been stellar for The Lyons. Diva Lavin has won before, but more than deserved an award for Collected Stories when she did that prior to New York! Another fine actress! Divas, divas everywhere!
I've heard Jeff Calhoun's direction of Newsies is super, and he - she? - sure deserves his - her? - nod. Diva? Suuuure! He loves to hold court! In LA he directed such unique renditions of Oliver and Big River at Deaf West Theatre...and his Bonnie and Clyde, which somehow fell apart by the time it got to New York, was thrilling when it first premiered in La Jolla! She told those producers to leave it alone, but they wouldn't listen, Blanche! Calhoun is not to blame!
Watch the Awards televised from coast to coast June 10! I know Don and I will. Hasta la pasta! Gee that's a good idea for a Tony Awards party. And...Diva Peters, sweet little Bernie herself, is getting a special Tony for being charitable.
What did she do, you ask? The Cute Diva wrote too cutesy children's books about what doggies do for an organization she founded with Mary Tyler Moore called Broadway Barks! These divas will do anything to raise a buck or two, what can I tell 'ya! Money's important! I wish I had some!
Remember, June 10!
Signing off for now, and ... as far as Divas go,
The public agrees:
Dona's # One.
Charles Busch in a biblical epic called Judith of Bethulia at Theater for the New City on First Avenue in NYC 'til April 28 only!
Like Mae always was, he's surrounded by hunky, humpy men! And to quote Busch himself, it's an ugly business, so every once in a while he feels compelled to write something pure fun for himself to play.
Dolls, I'm basically a good Catholic girl who's terribly shy at heart. Would you believe I used to sing in my church choir and attend midnight mass on Easter? Well, those cute alter boys in procession around the church sure gave me a lot to look at. I used to wonder just how serious they were about the religion. Was I the only one with impure thoughts - and with the unmitigated gall to mask them by feigning holiness with a few rounds of "The Hallelujah Chorus"? Shame, shame on such hypocrisy! No Easter basket pour moi! Now that I'm a big girl - and you know how big I am - nothing's changed. It seems like changes should have occurred over the years, but they haven't. I still have impure thoughts - oh, yeah, one change: I've given up the choir and Lent and the Church altogether. Boy oh boy, you say, I sure could use a few prayers - and Hollywoodland or Sin City is certainly not the best place to be. But I still believe I'm good at heart, so that must count for something. OK, if I'm no longer religious, does Easter hold no more meaning than that enormous See's Bordeaux egg that's staring me in the face?
Again, shame on me! I must learn to share-even my candy! Well, as I'm meditating and trying to come up with the best solution to my problems, since this is Holy Week for some, Passover for others, why don't you help yourselves to that candy? In moderation of course! Or give it to some small hungry child who's just drooling for a sugar fix. Tell him Dona sent it with LOL. Take a look at this silly story someone sent me about the true meaning of Easter.
What Is Easter?
Three stupid guys just died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first man, "WHAT IS EASTER?" The man replies, "Oh, that's easy, it's the holiday in November when everybody gets together, eats turkey, and is thankful..."
"WRONG," replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second man the same question, "WHAT IS EASTER?"
The second man replies, "No, Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second man, shakes his head in disgust, looks at the third man and asks, "WHAT IS EASTER?"
The third man smiles and looks St. Pete in the eye.
"I know what Easter is. Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and He was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took Him to be crucified and was stabbed in the side, made Him wear a crown of thorns, and He was hung on a cross. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder. Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out, and if He sees his shadow there will be six more weeks of winter."
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Cute take, huh?
I'll be back in a few days with tales of celebrity Easter celebrations. Baskets, bunnies, bonnets - name your Easter poison!
Well, dolls, one look at the photo below just about made me want to puke - big time! I mean I've stopped going to church and the ... Kardashians go together on Easter Sunday? It's downright...As Big Daddy would say...deception, deception, I'm surrounded by deception...
I'm too upset to continue. Hopefully, May will perk me up! Enjoy!!!
Do I play demure and keep my mouth shut or do I bellow and roar like a good Diva should? Billy Crystal - has-been or savior? Did he really SAVE the Oscar telecast or is it back to the drawing board for 2013? Perky Ellen Degeneres sure kept those commercials on a big budget but hopping! Best Actress winner Meryl Streep - an actress to savor or dismiss? Is this Oscar a polite way of saying: "No more, old broad! Get lost!" Gwyneth Paltrow & Robert Downey Jr. - a vision in white vs a washed-up loon: Nurse Ratched devours McMurphy at last?
Proceed, dollcakes ... if you dare!
Oh, when all else fails, I really did find the telecast entertaining even though we no longer see those great big production numbers where people sang and danced...every time the camera panned the audience and George Clooney, who could resist that big genuine smile? And Meryl and Viola Davis embracing before Meryl's name was announced? Streep is so gracious she should be nicknamed Grace...young actresses can learn from the kind way she treats others...she's one in a million! And I sincerely hope she will be up there a fourth time. I mean, if Kate Hepburn was - and she didn't even come and recognize the honor - then Streep certainly can do it too! Wait until August Osage County is filmed, her drug addicted mama will jump
right off the screen.
Well, back to the telecast...and what about this year's fashion? Michelle Williams was a petite angel in red, Gwyneth, as I mentioned already, a vision in white, even though she looked like she might have stepped out of a cloister for the evening...and what about that classy Penelope Cruz...and even J Lo's gown was quite arresting although her cleavage took first prize...if you've got it, dolls, flaunt it!
Billy Crystal can make anyone laugh, and I wouldn't mind seeing Whoopi back as Hostess, but only paired with Crystal! Who cares if he donned black face to play Sammy Davis Jr.? He's always done it...and hey, it's BC! And who ever said a comedian had to be politically correct?
The Artist is the best! Deserves every prize it won! Great movie - such originality - and that Jean Dujardin, a sexpot...I mean, my dears, could a more handsome man light up the silver screen? I thought I was watching Valentino...a real charmer! And ... a dog lover to boot!
Until 2013...and I understand, they're exiting the Kodak...I mean The Hollywood/Highland Center ... Por que?
Stay tuned for more Hollywood madness!
Now here's a great ad campaign for next year's Oscars. If Ellen can win over her audience as a salesperson, why not my cute friend Jacques (below) selling ... men's undies? Too gay, you say? Darlings, Gay is in! Talk about ratings boosts!
Let's start off this juicy LUV month with a basic definition of love by stating what love is NOT: Possessiveness is not love
Jealousy is not love
Lust is not love
Fear is not love
Keeping people all to yourself is not love
Expecting something from someone is not love ... Shucks, then what the f--- is love? Sure as hell puts a damper on those naughty dreams I had last night. ---------------------------------------- Now this Love poem offers food for thought:If I could have just one wish, I would wish to wake up everyday to the sound of your breath on my neck, the warmth of your lips on my cheek, the touch of your fingers on my skin, and the feel of your heart beating with mine... Knowing that I could never find that feeling with anyone other than you. - Courtney Kuchta - Another short food for thought poem is the following:
A sad farewell to another diva, Miss Whitney Houston, whose "I Will Always Love You" says it all...and she passed away during luv month. Godspeed! Diva Dolly Parton sure as hell will be wading in mula from the increased sales of this superhit. In case you didn't already know, Dolly wrote that song!
Dolls, love is such a beautiful thing, something that should inspire us all year long. Love is giving of oneself unconditionally. Think of your doggies and how they treat you! Of course, that selfish little me will joke about needs and lust and such, but deep down, you know I'm a wholesome gal at heart. I love my friends and all of you, my dear readers. Let's always stay true to one another! _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ...but if you have a negative comment about moi ... keep it to yourself! Until March when I get down and d---- and as Irish as all hell.
Like all rising stars, I, Diva Dona, face new challenges at the onset of 2012. Note to my adoring fans, I absolutely abhor resolutions, so if I'm facetious with the following life lessons put forth by a 90 year-old, find forgiveness for me in your hearts!
Life isn't fair, but it'sstill good. (Who said this, Pollyanna?)
When in doubt, just take the next small step. (I like things big; I can only take giant steps. Does that mean I'm doomed?)
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Change the way you think.(With this I'm in 100% agreement)
Pay off your credit cards every month..(Quelle bore! Where's all the fun in living on the edge?)
Save for retirement starting with your first pay check.(Who in the hell thinks about retirement when you're 19?)
When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile. (Another agree. It has prevented me from sticking to any diet so far in my life!)
Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.(How can I make peace with ex-husbands who were rotten, thieving bast....?)
Take a deep breath It calms the mind. (Sit down and put your head between your legs too. It's a start!)
Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.(Man oh man, this broad must have been independently wealthy!)
Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple. (Didn't I say this first?)
The most important sex organ is the brain. (Even approaching old age, I have a hard time with that one!)
When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer. (Right on, all the way!)
Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
The best is yet to come...
Those last four belong in the Diva Dona hall of fame. Let's all hope for a happier, glorious 2012!