Saturday, February 5, 2011

March, 2011 - GREEN QUEEN for a DAY

I'll do anything for Saint Patty, but I never thought for a million years, dolls, that I would be GREEN. Maybe I could pick up a tour as Elphaba? Too old, you say? You're never too old to be a witch... a bitch... no a witch...a bitchy witch...a witchy bitch! Whatever, I've got the stuff! Stay tuned! I may make Wicked yet!
And talk about wickedly gorgeous, have you seen the new Jane Fonda in 33 Variations @ the Ahmanson fresh from some PS? She looks uncannily like she did 50 years ago in those Barbarella days. Talk about sexy grandmas; she's got yours truly thinking about the kni.. ouch!!! No, no, no, never! But that's what Jane said too, and look at her! Don't get the wrong idea about those gloves. She doesn't do what you're thinking. This is adult stuff but good and clean!
In the meantime, let's talk about fans, dolls. If the item below is an example of how a Queen should be treated by...
How do I take this?! I have only one retort: chew on this m-----!

I never meant to be crass, but when you are sent a photo like the one above in the mail - for an autograph, no less! Ahhhh! The nerve and humiliation. I don't want to sound like a school marm, but tell me who you are, your return address shows only a post office box number in South Central LA. I'll do my best to forgive you! In the meantime, Oscar's on my brain!
I watched the 83rd Academy Awards ceremony on Sunday, February 27. Ann Hathaway and James Franco co-hosted - are you friggin' kidding? This job is reserved for the big wigs like Johnny Carson, Bob Hope, Billy Crystal - thank God, he showed up - or Hugh Jackman: now there's a great piece of  ...
entertainment ... but these two youngsters are... inexperienced, babes in arms. True, Hathaway has an adorable personality and looked sensational in the several sleek gowns she wore, but...I'm speechless. Speechless, not breathless...Hmmmmmm!  And Franco's splendid drag as Marilyn Monroe was ruined by his refusal to do anything with it. He was as butch as all get out. He looked good, but had no fun with it.
Did I miss something? If it was intended that way, what a drag, indeed! I mean why put on that makeup, get all dressed up like a woman and then act like a man?! I should know all about that, my dears!! Thank God for Melissa Leo's four letter word - it broke the monotony of the evening and also Randy Newman's little joke about expanding the number of song nominees. Sandra Bullock's down-to-earth comments with the Best Actor nominees was also cute, but the overall show- a BORE! And that chorus of kiddies at the end performing "Over the Rainbow" gleefully as all the winners dashed out from behind like munchkins, from what looked like an unfinished outdoor set from The Wizard of Oz.    OMG!!!!!!!!!!!  Thank heavens it's only once a year that we have to suffer such insanity! Annette Bening -sadly a four time loser - looked glam as did Bullock and most of the others. Natalie Portman gave a lovely, sweet acceptance speech and Colin Firth - what a class act!
The gowns were pretty but this Hollywood Easter Parade needed more flair and pizazz like the shows of yesteryear!!!!!!! Where was the ENTERTAINMENT? Perhaps across the street at the Hollywood Roosevelt!?
April, dolls, with more dish!

More Valentine Surprises

An old beau from the South named a rose after me. Remember Mrs. Minniver? Well, dolls, he's named it... Dona Rosa ... ahhhh!!

Funny Photo even created a Valentine gift in my honor. Photo Hearts carved in the sand - how sweet! Except, I can't quite figure out what that damn starfish is doing sitting next to me. Well, at the very least, I'm upstaging it! Maybe a symbol of my newfound glory? Anyway, I do hope it's good luck.  See you in March, my darlings, when my Irish nature will take full bloom.

When I See My Face in Lights

An internationally famous rock star - I'll never tell - saluted me as the Hot Mamma of All Time. What a treat, just in time for Valentine's Day. It makes an old woman's heart go pitter pat!